April 29, 2015
If you’re going to play with fire, you might as well play with all the matches and all the gasoline.
As Hillary Clinton—herself rich beyond any normal person’s most avaricious dreams—prattles about the need to “topple the 1%;” as Supreme Court justices who have already openly demonstrated their very strong bias in favor of same-sex “marriage” get ready to pretend to hear the case; as America’s most expensive president whips up passions against “inequality,” after dining, at the public expense, at a ridiculously posh restaurant where a “Charter Membership” costs $500,000.
After all this, and too much more to mention, have our dear leaders left any stone unturned, any match unstruck, when it comes to provoking domestic un-tranquility and maybe even civil strife?
Oh, there are a lot more things that they can do! It’s just a matter of getting around to all of them.
My progressive friend from 666 University, Professor Bill Zebub, has clued me in on a few of these coming projects.
For one thing, he wonders, why is it that only Christians who own small businesses, with some connection to the wedding trade, are forced to outrage their consciences by actively participating in “gay” pseudo-weddings? That’s just a miniscule portion of the total Christian population. Why shouldn’t all Christians be compelled to “celebrate” these events?
You don’t have to be a baker, a musician, a florist, a photographer, or a caterer to take part in a “gay wedding.” There will always be a need for people to pick up the trash and clean up the mess afterwards. Why not make every single Christian responsible for some small part in such festivities? It could become a regular civic obligation, like jury duty.
President *Batteries Not Included has suggested that voting be made compulsory. Why not take it just one baby-step farther, and mandate that voting for Democrats be made compulsory? You’ll still have a choice of which progressive candidate to vote for. This would greatly enhance Democracy in America—and ensure that only geniuses get to be in charge of anything.
Then there is the nagging problem of Americans not eating as they’re supposed to. Junk food, red meat, sweets—how is the federal government supposed to micro-manage health care when the people aren’t eating healthy? The Worst Lady has already shown the way, dictating the contents of public school lunchroom menus. That the kids refuse to eat this glop is a plus in the war against obesity.
Furthermore, now that the president’s executive orders have been established as all-purpose, incontrovertible decrees, it’s time we really did something about Climate Change—before rising sea levels inundate Topeka and Omaha and we all die wretched deaths.
Science has shown that Climate Change, in addition the obvious factors like too much carbon dioxide in the air and not enough money paid out to the government, is also caused by Homophobia, Income Inequality, White Privilege, and anything else that springs to the progressive mind. Indeed, it’s also caused by failure to silence and punish Climate Change Denial, that great crime against the human race.
Why not use Climate Change-themed executive orders to remove the stumbling blocks on the path to Utopia? Why not use those orders to raise the tax rate to 100% (government officials, union leaders, rap artistes, and Democrat donors exempted, of course), wipe out Hate in all its forms, erase White Privilege forever (government officials, union leaders, movie stars, and Democrat donors exempted, of course), and shut up those Global Warming nay-sayers once and for all?
Really, there isn’t anything you shouldn’t be allowed to do, if you’re Saving the Planet.
Oh, what a lovely fire this will make!
� 2015 Lee Duigon - All Rights Reserved
Lee Duigon, a contributing editor with the Chalcedon Foundation, is a former newspaper reporter and editor, small businessman, teacher, and horror novelist. He has been married to his wife, Patricia, for 34 years. See his new fantasy/adventure novels, Bell Mountain and The Cellar Beneath the Cellar, available on www.amazon.com