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By Darren Weeks
October 7, 2014
NewsWithViews.com

The press coverage of the recent security breach at the White House is excoriating the Secret Service. The latest circus appears to be an emerging media meme that the Secret Service is incompetent and cannot be trusted to keep the "president" safe. The most recent Secret Service scandal reminds this writer of Obama's trip to Latin America, back in April, when several Secret Service agents were found to be gallavanting with prostitutes, some of whom may have even been minors. Sexual deviancy among Washingtonites? Shocking, I know!

It is, therefore, completely understandable why the media would have focused so much time on the Secret Service prostitution patronage, given the fact that they are such patriarchs of moral standard-bearing, always adhering to their rightful and Constitutional role of exposing government corruption, whenever and wherever they find it. We can be certain that there could not have been an agenda behind the coverage. Still, the most debauched, sneering cynic could suggest the media has it in for the agency. Such a suggestion might cause some to wonder whether privatization of the agency lies on the horizon.

The scuttlebutt is that everyone in the country should now desperately fear for the "president" and his family's safety. The Great and Noble Golf Club Swinger, who has done nothing but put the safety of all of the American people and their families in peril since he took office, must be protected from the rabble under-class, who pay for his living quarters. After all, said "rabble under-class" might infect the aforementioned "living quarters" with their presence. We cannot have the human "resources" tracking mud on the royal carpets, now can we? Clearly, this is what Homeland Security was designed to prevent. It obviously wasn't designed to — well, protect the homeland.

Let's see... we have drug cartels on the U.S.-Mexican border beheading people, and hanging their bodies from overpasses and billboards. The Great and Noble One's solution? Open the borders wider while running guns to the very cartel members that are chopping off the heads. That will teach 'em. Nothing like tough leadership. Then, you attempt to take away firearms from the American people so they are sitting ducks when the cartels run rampant slaughtering, killing, and extorting. Now that's "change we can believe in"!

Ebola allegedly breaks out in Africa. The Great and Noble Club Swinger rushes to close the border and ban travel from the infected region, right? You silly, silly reader! The natural "solution" for the birth certificate-challenged Kenyan, is to bring in as many Latin American people as possible, many of whom are likely being trafficked from West Africa by human smuggling cartels that have set up shop in Africa. Would you expect any less? The community organizer's "logical" response is to push amnesty even harder for thousands of foreigners, arrange for transportation for them throughout the country, so as to encourage as many of the diseased migrants to come as possible.

Then, he holds meetings with African leaders in Washington D.C. Was some secret deal cut? Why do we have allegedly infected people being flown into the United States, purportedly for "treatment"?

Now, before you go getting any ideas, you must remember that travel bans from Ebola-infected countries in Africa would be too much trouble. We wouldn't want to inconvenience anyone, would we? Instead, we must listen to UN/WHO goons tell us to leave our borders wide open and allow ourselves to remain completely exposed, allowing infected people to fly in from Africa. Closing the borders would interfere with globalization. Globalization has so many benefits! Look around you. How prosperous you've become with your new "free trade" economy! Observe your cultural diversity! Certainly, you would never want to return to that nasty old "protectionism" and "national sovereignty" of the unenlightened years.

We do have to wonder what relationship, if any, does the current outbreak have with the 9,220 vials of pathogens, including Ebola, that turned up in the Fort Detrick inventory, but had not been there in the past? How did the vials get there? How many of them went missing before the inventory was conducted? Was Fort Detrick being used as a staging ground for Ebola infection operations in Africa? Why was the U.S. military performing secret missions in Africa prior to the outbreak? Why do the African people accuse international "health" workers of spreading the disease, even to the point of fighting them with machetes? We suppose these fearful Africans are just paranoid "conspiracy theorists". They're not very well educated or knowledgeable — even though they are closest to the situation on the ground. We Americans are so much smarter. We do have a smart grid, you know.

When it comes to Gun Control, one might assume that the Great and Noble Teleprompted Speech Reader might lead by example. One might assume that. One might be wrong.

The most honest measure of virtue for a White House-occupying gun hater to take, would be a complete and total disarmament of the Secret Service. After all, guns are evil. Right Mr. club swinger? If guns are evil for the American people to own and possess, certainly you wouldn't want an irresponsible and incompetent federal agency such as your very own SS to have them around you?

Of course, that might mean you should also quit funding and arming Syrian and Iraqi terrorists when they organize to form caliphates. Giving them even more weapons, training, and money while people starve and lose their homes in the USA might be construed as having your priorities a little out of whack, but hey... who are we to judge? It's only our government. At least, it used to be.

So, go ahead! Destroy more homes. Destroy more military families. The American people won't even notice as long as they have their faces planted in Facebook. Allow even more refugees, whose countries in the Middle East you've destroyed, into the USA. I'm sure they'll try not to have too big a chip on their shoulder and too much hatred in their hearts. We all understand. It's your way. It's what you do. What else could we expect from a Nobel Peace Prize winner? Perhaps, they'll get a kidney stone, or suffer a fatal heart attack before they can harm us.

Your "Affordable" Care Act is driving up medical costs to the point where they'll never be able to get medical insurance or treatment, which will mean they will die, right along with all of the elderly American people. That should make your freak pals John Holdren, and Paul Ehrlich happy, since they are not too fond of elderly people, or people in general.

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As far as the Secret Service, the media should cut them some slack. The SS had to make some cuts when sequestration was invented, and the government had to pretend like ran out of money. How do you run out of money when you create it from nothing? Crazy, huh? Not as crazy as some loon with a pocket knife actually getting into the White House! Shiver me timbers! It's time to be very afraid for the Royal Family. Maybe we should be pushing for a national pocket knife registry. We could follow that by banning all nail clippers. The terrorists, after all, might use them to sharpen their finger nails and claw us.