BUILDING CLOSER RELATIONSHIPS

By David Bresnahan
July 3, 2002
NewsWithViews.com

A few times during the year I get personal. In the past it has been at Thanksgiving and Christmas. This year the 4th of July has stired some emotions and a desire to share something of me personally with you, my loyal readers and listeners.

Independence Day 2002 is uniquely special because we are at war, and because we now have a greater sense of what is really important to us a new perspective.

Until 9/11 we took too much for granted, and we were a bit too selfish. We neglected friendships, family relationships, and we became too attached to our material possessions.

This week many of us will vacation with our family, or just spend time together around the barbeque with the people who matter most in our lives.

Times are tough for many, and likely to get tougher for more. Churches have more people in pews than in the recent past, and more and more fathers are finding time for their kids and wives more often than they once did.

Communication is a key element we are struggling to keep in our lives, because we know that we spend too little time talking and listening -- particularly time listening.

We did a lot of both, in between tears, in the days and weeks following 9/11, but we have struggled to hold on to that intimate communication that builds relationships that last forever. Yet we now find ourselves slipping back into complacency and taking life for granted once again.

If our world comes crashing in on us through the act of some deranged terrorist who wants to meet his god and take us along, we need to be sure we have our lives in order.

The Irish have a saying, and I have used it to close my radio show. "Live every day as if it's your last, and one day you'll be right." Wise saying, and something we should take seriously.

The times we live in give us a great deal to consider. We live in a period of history when it can all end very suddenly. If that happens all we can take with us will be our relationships with God and with people (good or bad), and our memories.

We cannot change the past, but we can certainly work on building on the present for a better future. It does not happen by itself. We have to make time to be with our kids, our spouse, our extended family and then we have to really communicate. That takes work, but it is worth it.

Every day we should be building positive relationships and creating memories.

We also need to do more than just go to church. Being there makes us feel good, but taking what we learn there and making part of us helps us to make others feel good. Again, communication is the key as we take time every day for private, personal prayer and study of the scriptures.

Finding ways to be of service to others will help us to put our religion into action, and not only will we bless the lives of others, but we will also find greater joy than we have ever found before 9/11 when were being so selfish.

If we put ourselves last and others first in our lives we will begin to develop those eternal relationships that make life worth living. We all need to make the effort to build a habit this week. We need to tell the people who matter most how much we love them. We must not leave such things unsaid for tomorrow it may be too late. We must develop a personal relationship with our God through personal, private daily prayer. And let us also remember those who are sacrificing time from their families to protect our freedoms from those who would snatch it all away.

"Family Answers" is a FREE 39-minute video featuring family relations experts who offer some specific advice on how to communicate more effectively, how to positively and peacefully resolve conflict, and how to encourage greater understanding within your family. This excellent video, provided free from The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, has helped many families. http://www.mormon.org/freevideo/ 1,10163,1415-1-1178-1149,00.html CLICK here to order one for yourself or someone else.

In this world of evil all around us, we need to lock arms and gain strength from one another. I recall a poem from my childhood: "You go to your church, and I'll go to mine, but let's walk along together.

It is time for us to focus on our many similarities, not our differences. It is time to spend our time and effort on the things that matter most -- our families.

May God bless America!

� 2002 David Bresnahan - All Rights Reserved