W.R. Marshall -- That Dancin' Fool is Still in the White House

THAT DANCIN' FOOL IS STILL IN THE WHITE HOUSE

by Dr. W.R. Marshall, Ph.D
March 1, 2008
NewsWithViews.com

It�s been quite the week in politics.

Barack and Hillary tussle in a big debate in Texas, which ends on a friendly note with hugs and warm fuzzy feelings for the party and the future�then Hillary wakes up the next day, realizes she�s still not President and tears Barack a new one, accuses him of Rovian tactics, and challenges him to a no-holds-barred cage match.

Then John (I did it my way�with a little help from Charles Keating) McCain gets a back of the hand from the New York Times. In a detailed piece by a bunch of writers, McCain�s judgment concerning lobbyists is called into question. The media, being who they are, supplicates itself before the great god of sleaze and lo! � they find the smoking bra. However, no one thinks McCain had a Clinton/Gingrich inappropriate relationship with the woman in question, it was more of a Cunnignham/Renzi (google these two congressmen for the facts) inappropriate relationship. The allegation is just about influence peddling, not sex. (Given that McCain is 71 and this putative incident took place eight years ago, and there is no mention of lobbyists from the drug companies, nor is former Viagra spokesman Bob Dole in any way involved, I�m inclined to believe the �no-sex� part.)

So, is it any wonder we tend to forget about ol� Dubya. No one talks about him much. He�s all but irrelevant, which for him has become belligerence. He refuses to budge on anything, including surveillance legislation in which he wants retroactive and proactive immunity for any crimes committed while trying to listen in on terrorist phone calls. It�s like getting that ring from Frodo Baggins; just slip it on and no one will know you ever have�or ever will�do anything wrong.

To be honest, that�s probably Count Cheney�s doing, (has anyone seen him in the daylight lately), because our President is too busy doing everything he can to go from being a political joke, to just a joke. Why do I say this?�because they let him dance again.

Is anyone in the White House paying attention?

Don�t you remember him dancing a while back in Brazil, bustin� a move with Laura and Condi shaking their groove-things in the background? You�d think that would have been enough, and his people would be on the lookout for infectious drumbeats.

But no.

The President headed to Africa last week, where he�s honestly trying to do something worthwhile�fight AIDS and malaria (and secure oil and hopefully nation build)�then, there he went again.

The most powerful leader in the world, wearing his trademark insipid grin, shakin� n� bakin� with Liberian President Ellen Johnson-Sirleaf. There�s more. It seemed every time someone plucked a kalimba, the 43rd President of the United States felt the need to do his MC Hammer imitation.

And it wasn�t pretty.

And everyone knows it wasn�t pretty, which is why classically trained pianist, second rate political appointee, and Bush gal-pal, Condi Rice had to reassure an embarrassed and mostly indifferent public with these words: "I just want to report that the president did a fair amount of dancing when he was in Africa and demonstrated that he can stay on the beat. You look skeptical, but I was there?(sic) I can certify."

She couldn�t certify the 9/11 threat, wasn�t much help on WMD�s, but she knows when a middle-aged white guy is two-steppin� in time.

Look, Dubya, if you want to be king�and we all know you do�try acting like one. I�m not talking about all your decrees and your petulant complaining that everyone isn�t doing exactly what you want exactly when you want it�you got that part down. But how about a little dignity? You�re father blowin� chunks in Japan had more class than you trying to shake your booty on the African plain. How about a little toe-tappin�, some polite clapping your hands to the music? That should work. There�s no need for you to strip to the waist and jump in every time you hear a doumbek thumping.

And while I�m here: enough with dragging Condi and Laura along on these jaunts. It�s beginning to look a little strange.

Then again, maybe it�s supposed to. Maybe it�s a ruse so we all look at Dubya and get queasy and forget Cheney�s back there, pulling the strings and cackling, �Dance, monkey, dance.�

WR Marshall is a syndicated columnist and novelist. His column, 'A Dull Ache'(tm) is read in over one hundred markets around the world. He also has a PhD, which he's still paying for-in more ways than one...