by Lee Duigon
I can’t make up my mind what to write about today—Andrew Cuomo getting a $5.1 million book deal, or the IRS and the Postal Service teaming up to frustrate our efforts to pay our taxes. Let’s see if I can find space for both.
Cuomo’s book has a catchy title—“American Crisis: Leadership Lessons from the COVID-19 Pandemic.” We have heard the original title was “How to Get Away with Absurd Public Policies that Really Hurt and Even Killed a Lot of People, and Survive a Barrage of Sexual Harassment Scandals That Would Sink an Aircraft Carrier,” but it was felt that this might be construed as bragging. Gov. Cuomo is nothing if not modest; and he does have a lot to be modest about.
Under Cuomo’s inspired leadership, COVID patients were carelessly shunted into nursing homes where they infected a lot of elderly residents, thousands of whom died. Cuomo’s efforts to pin the blame for this catastrophe on others is enough to inspire a new dance craze.
To protect convicted felons from catching the virus, Cuomo let thousands of them out of jail. Guess what a lot of them went back to doing as soon as they got out. Cuomo also got rid of bail requirements: half an hour after they bust you for armed robbery or aggravated assault, they let you go. By following these simple steps, New York under Cuomo (and I do mean under) achieved a soaring crime rate that’s the envy of the uncivilized world.
But that’s only the public portion of Gov. Cuomo’s leadership lessons. Aside from this, he is currently leading the public figures’ league in active sexual harassment scandals—no mean accomplishment, these days. There’s a virtual ballpark full of women accusing him. We’ve lost count. It staggers the imagination, trying to calculate the energy expended on hitting on so many women. But he still needs one rape accusation to break Bill Clinton’s record.
Colleges and universities are already scrambling to make “Leadership Lessons” a degree program on a par with Gender Studies, using Cuomo’s opus as the textbook. We’ve gotta believe he’s already booking speaking arrangements all over the country so he can rake in the cash after he’s done being a governor.
But for the time being, the fact that residents are fleeing New York in droves is eloquent testimony to the effects of Cuomo’s leadership. Let’s not forget the immortal words he spoke in 2018: “America was never that great.”
It’ll never be that great again, if he has anything to do with it.
Oh, fap! I don’t really have enough space left to devote to the cockups perpetrated by the Postal Service and the IRS vis-à-vis our attempts to pay our taxes. Suffice it to say that a letter from the IRS, which we were supposed to receive last Friday, never arrived and now the Postal Service is saying they can’t find it. The sage advice offered by the clerk: “You can just wait until you get it.” Uh-huh. Somehow it reminds me of General Custer saying to his troops at the Little Bighorn, “We’ve got ‘em now, boys!”
It’s invigorating to know our country’s in such good hands. What a stroke of genius it was, to entrust such a big chunk of our presidential election to the Postal Service.
It could’ve been worse.
We could have entrusted it to Andrew Cuomo.
I have discussed these and other topics throughout the week on my blog, http://leeduigon.com/ . Click the link and stop in for a visit, while it’s still allowed. My articles can also be found at www.chalcedon.edu/ .
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